Thursday, May 31, 2007

Taking the process out of the room

Hello world.

I have a new mission for canyouswim - to bring this process of being present out of the room (therapy work) and into my 'real' world. Perhaps by getting back to journaling I can start to integrate presence back to the day to day.

I have this well established habit of forgetting who I am and my connection to the world - friends, family, work. I have to keep remembering to come back. So, I must get back to writing.

Ok, rambling. Maybe I can set aside an uninterrupted block of 15 minutes each day to check in and be present?

So, today I'm working on consciously saying goodbye to K's family. Maybe one day I'll write a letter or something? For now I'll start here.

Dear J & C, J & L -

I'm so sorry that the marriage did not work out. I've really enjoyed the time we've had together - even our time J & L. Time has a way of smoothing out rough edges, and I can see that all of you had become a surrogate family to me. Your family dynamic was always much more present - for better or worse :) - and I had been finding your family connection to be a healing presence for me.

Please forgive me for my part in how the marriage failed. I hope that my presence in your life was meaningful to you as yours was to me.

So. Goodbye. Farewell. I hope life treats you kindly. I hope that you'll think of me from time to time, as I have you.

Love,

- Chris